I’m trying to be good.

On Mon-Thurs, I’ve been waking up early to work out before work.  Then, I have work.  Then, I go to school.  Doesn’t sound like much and it’s tiring.  I get home and I cannot sleep and I don’t understand what is going on in class.  The classes are so small that you have to participate or it’ll hurt your grade.

In between I try to eat somewhat healthy and move around a lot.  I try to ensure I have lunch breaks and I take walks.

And yet, THAT FUCKING STUFF MEANS CRAP.

I just gain more and more weight and I dont’ want to buy more clothes.  I am just going to weigh more than my bf and that LITERALLY  MAKES ME CRY.

So, I should just give up on that.

why get up early in the morning?  i could just starve myself and it’ll actually do something.

what is the point of working hard and not getting anything out of it?

seriously?

i’ll try to finish this semester, but i don’t have the passion nor smarts nor time nor energy to do this.

i think two weeks is enough to know at this point.  i have a job, i should just be happy i have a job.